Friendliness for Fighting and Freedom

Photo by Elijah Henderson on Unsplash

Friendliness is a wisdom that wins every fight. It is impossible to fight someone who insists on being friendly. It refuses temptation to hurt or be hurt, continuing to hope for the best in the other person and the relationship.

Friendliness insists on the relational ideal: I am no threat to you and you can be no threat to me.

It thrives on the belief that all things are possible through believing in the other person’s capacity to respond to and in love.

Friendliness must surely be a form of godliness. There is nothing in it that can be restrained, for it is free to love as surely as if there was no such thing as hurt.

Conflict is something that potentially breaches both parties’ trust, but if a gentle and confident form of friendliness is present in one, the other soon has the freedom to trust again.

Perhaps simply being friendly is a beautiful mix of gentleness, kindness, meekness, patience, and compassion that equals love. If I cannot be threatened and I can prove I am no threat to you, we are both in a safe and good place, together.

Of course, friendliness has to be underpinned by a good dose of humility, because pride is too easily threatened. It must have faith to walk forward believing the best in another person who is potentially assaulting us. It should also be impervious to fear; worry for reputation and regard is not the domain of a person given to friendliness.

Friendliness transcends the option to fight, opting instead for decisions that promote freedom.

Those with the gift of friendliness must be wary, however, for everyone has the potential to be burned.

** Big disclaimer here as far as abuse is concerned. There are people for whom friendliness won’t work.