Grief is something I have experienced
It’s something I will experience, again
Whilst there is life and love there will be grief
To live a life devoid of grief is to live life in vain.
Grief is such a hard thing to describe, as is how we cope well under the strain of a thing we cannot explain. Grief may be torturous and it may render us numb. But the sadness encapsulated in loss is just too palpable to ignore. Even things that cannot easily be described, and especially these inexplicable things, involve a mutiny of the senses, where only a shallow resolve remains.
Yet, if we leave grief there, and do not insist upon exploring our sorrow, we will learn nothing, and we will gain little strength. Worst of all, perhaps, is we won’t be set up for the next experience of grief – for it is almost certainly coming.
Entering the salubrious wonder of sadness in grief is to believe that the purpose of the worst is to bring out our best. In such an economy we cannot lose, even though we have lost.
Grieving well is a life skill of the temperament that no longer insists on controlling everything.
Grieving well is a life skill because, to experience grief, is to experience what is so universal in nature.
And the purpose of grieving well is to acknowledge this truth in our hearts and not just in our minds: we are no longer our own, and because we have transcended our selfish regards, God has taken the negative power of our sadness away from us. We are no longer fearful of this negatively powered sadness. All we want to simply do is to preach the power of this message, because anyone can experience the simplicity and magnificence of the truth of this message.
It sounds ridiculous: to enter willingly into the salubrious wonder of sadness. But it is what we must do as we journey with our grief and we make a pleasant requiem out of the love we have lost.
How will we live this life,
Within grief that unveils strife?
Where God has made love known,
And by love lost He’s principally shown.
Love’s cost is the pit of grief,
For love lost is compromised relief,
Yet through sadness is our only hope,
Being true in our sorrow we cope.
© 2014 S. J. Wickham.